Adoption
Categories: Incomplete lists | Adoption | Family law
Adoption is the legal act of permanently placing a child with a parent or parents other than the birth parents. Adoption results in the severing of the parental responsibilities and rights of the biological parents and the placing of those responsibilities and rights onto the adoptive parents. After the finalization of an adoption, there is little or no legal difference between biological and adopted children.
Different jurisdictions have varying laws on adoption and post-adoption. Some practice confidential or closed adoption, preventing further contact between the adopted person and the biological parents, while others have varying degrees of open adoption, which may allow such contact. An underreported fact is that open adoptions are not legally enforceable agreements in many jurisdictions[1]. I.e., an open adoption may be closed at any time for any reason.
Reasons for adoption
Adoptions occur for many reasons. Many children are placed for adoption as a result of the biological parents' decision that they are unable to adequately care for a child. In some countries, where single motherhood may be considered scandalous and unacceptable, some women in this situation make an adoption plan for their infants. In some cases, they abandon their children at or near an orphanage, so that they can be adopted.
Some biological parents involuntarily lose their parental rights. This usually occurs when the children are placed in foster care because they were abused, neglected or abandoned. Eventually, if the parents cannot resolve the problems that caused or contributed to the harm caused to their children (such as alcohol or drug abuse), a court may terminate their parental rights and the children may then be adopted.
Only a small percentage of adopted children are those orphaned because of the death of their biological parents.
In some cases, parents' rights have been terminated when their ethnic or cultural group has been deemed unfit by the controlling government. Aboriginal Peoples in Australia were affected by such policies, as were Native Americans in the United States and Canada. Moreover, unwed mothers in many countries still are often pressured or forced by families, religious bodies or governments into relinquishing their children for adoption. These practices of the past have become emotionally-charged social and political issues in recent years.
The main reason for adopting varies from one country to the next, depending largely on social and legal structures. The inability to reproduce biologically is a common reason. The most prevalent obstacle to producing a biological child is infertility. Another obstacle is the lack of a partner of the opposite sex or a lack of desire to use a surrogate or sperm donor. Single people and same-sex couples often adopt for this reason. In many Western countries, step-parent adoption is the most common form of adoption as people choose to cement a new family following divorce or death of one parent.
Some couples or individuals adopt children even though they are fertile. Some may choose to do this in order to avoid contributing to perceived overpopulation, or out of the belief that it is more responsible to care for otherwise parent-less children than to reproduce. Others may do so to avoid passing on heritable diseases (e.g., Tay-Sachs disease), or out of health concerns relating to pregnancy and childbirth. Others believe that it is an equally valid form of family building, neither better than nor worse than biology.
Applying to adopt
In some countries, applications must be made to a state agency or agencies responsible for adoption. There may also be private, licensed adoption agencies, who may operate either on a commercial or non-profit basis. Agencies may operate only domestically, or may offer international adoptions, or may facilitate both. Some jurisdictions allow lawyers to arrange private adoptions, and some allow private facilitators to operate.
On applying to adopt, the potential adoptive parent(s) will generally be assessed for suitability. This can take the form of a home study, interviews, and financial, medical and criminal record checks. In some jurisdictions, such studies must be carried out by an independent or state authority, while in others, they can be carried out by the adoption agency itself. A pre-adoption course may also be required.
Infants are more commonly sought than toddlers or older children, and many adoptive parents seek to adopt children of the same race. As a result, governments, as well as agencies, actively seek families who are interested in adopting older children and children with special needs.
Cost of adoption
Adoption costs & assistance vary between countries. In many countries, it is illegal to charge for an adoption, while in others, adoptions must be facilitated on a non-profit basis. On the other hand many adoption programmes will give financial assistance to adopters, especially with their expenses. Some jurisdictions offer tax credits to offset the cost of adoption.
Where there are charges for adoption there is often controversy, even in the case of non-profit agencies. Regulations may also specify to whom payments may or may not be made, e.g., in some jurisdictions, no money may be paid to a birth mother above her medical expenses.
International adoptions tend to be more expensive and often incur additional costs, as the adoptive parent(s) may be required to travel to the source country. Translation fees will also apply to legal documents.
Adoption numbers
| Country | Adoptions | Notes |
|---|---|---|
| Australia | 443 (2003-2004) [2] | includes known relative adoptions |
| United Kingdom | 3,700 (2004) | |
| United States | approx 127,000 (2001) [3] |
Issues surrounding adoption
The number of children available for adoption inside Western nations has dropped considerably in recent years, partly because of the legalization of abortions, and partly because of the increased acceptance of single parenthood. When a mother (or both parents) chooses to place the child with adoptive parents, the process of separation is difficult for all parties.
It has been argued that children adopted through international adoptions are best served when adoptive families commit to integrating the child's birth nation cultures, traditions, stories, languages and relationships. Some countries now require adoptive parents to keep the birth names of their adoptive children, and many adoptive parents choose to do this as it makes sense in helping their child develop a strong sense of self.
Another issue for prospective adoptive parents to be aware of is reactive attachment disorder (RAD). Many children, especially those beyond infancy in system care (e.g. foster, orphanage), domestic or foreign, develop this disorder due to the loss of the initial primary caregiver.
It is often assumed that adopting babies at a very young age (1-2 months) bears no trauma for the child, because most have no recollection of their own birth, a baby would be a 'blank canvas' and the adoption process no different than being raised by the natural parents. However, many adoptees have reported that they were made to feel - consciously or not - as if they should forever 'be grateful' to have been 'chosen'.
Some adoptees claim harm from the aura of secrecy and mixed messages surrounding closed adoption[4][5]. Common platitudes contradict what a child experiences and 'knows'. For instance, parents say "you're special", but the child becomes aware that "special" is either not accurate or not a compliment: people are not motivated to adopt by any perception that adopted children are preferable to biological children (a problem made worse when such platitudes are used to shut down unwanted lines of questioning). Children are routinely told that "your mother gave you to us because she loved you", yet the child must become aware that the parents, the culture, and the law all assume that the birth parent does not ever want to see her child ever again, and in fact the rationale given for closing adoption records is to protect the birth mother from the child. [6] These sorts of issues can have a negative impact on the child, as "special" comes to resemble a negatively-charged euphemism, or as they suspect their biological mother really didn't love them at all, while at the same time they experience an erosion of trust in those who appear to be lying to them. Adoptees may not feel free to discuss their own issues honestly, for fear of being ungrateful, hurting their adoptive parents' feelings, raising subjects they sense are taboo (such as the adoptive parents' true reasons for adopting, especially if this involves infertility) or incurring rejection.
Having an identity and personal history shrouded in secrecy may harm the ability to form a positive sense of identity. Family concerns regarding genealogy can be a source of confusion and pain.[7][8].
Adoption reform
It has not been until recently that various concepts relating to adoption have been put into question. Two important influences on "adoption reform" are Nancy Verrier and Florence Fischer. [9]
Verrier describes the "primal wound" as the "devastation which the infant feels because of separation from its natural mother. It is the deep and consequential feeling of abandonment which the baby adoptee feels after the adoption and which continues for the rest of his life. [10]"
Reunification
Many adopted people and natural parents who were separated by adoption have a desire to reunite. In countries which practice confidential adoption, this desire has led to efforts to open sealed records. In the United States, for example, there are organisations such as the Adoption reunion registry and Bastard Nation, which seeks to establish the right of adoptees to access their sealed records.
Adoptism
Adoptism is a prejudice against adoption defined by several beliefs:
- The belief that adoption is not a legitimate way to build a family
- The belief that birthing children is always preferable to adopting
- The belief that making an adoption plan is never a preferable option for birth mothers who are unable or choose not to raise their children
Two Kinds of Adoption Language:Positive Adoption Language
In most cultures, adoptive families face adoptism. Adoptism is made evident in English speaking cultures by the prominent use of negative or inaccurate language describing adoption. To combat adoptism, many adoptive families encourage positive adoption language. On the other hand, many natural parents see "positive adoption language" as language which glosses over painful facts.
|
Most used: |
Proposed: |
Reason for proposal: |
|---|---|---|
|
your own child |
birth child |
Saying a birth child is your own child or one of your own children implies that an adopted child is not. |
|
child is adopted |
child was adopted |
Some adoptees believe that their adoption is not their identity, but is an event that happened to them. ("Adopted" becomes a participle rather than an adjective.) Others contend that "is adopted" makes adoption sound like a disability to be overcome. |
|
give up for adoption |
place for adoption or make an adoption plan |
"Give up" implies a lack of value. The preferred terms are more emotionally neutral. |
|
real mother/father/parent |
birth, biological or genetic |
The use of the term "real" implies that the adoptive family is artificial, and is not as descriptive. |
|
your adopted child |
your child |
The use of the adjective 'adopted' signals that the relationship is qualitatively different from that of parents to birth children. |
Two Kinds of Adoption Language: Honest Adoption Language
Some adoptive families say that they face "adoptism," although research supporting this assertion is scarce. The claim is that "adoptism" is made evident in English speaking cultures by the prominent use of negative or inaccurate language describing adoption. To combat "adoptism", many adoptive families encourage "positive adoption language" or PAL.
On the other hand, many natural parents see PAL as language which glosses over the very painful facts they face as they go into the indefinite post-adoption period of their lives. Some natural parents feel PAL has become a way to present adoption in the friendliest light possible, in order to obtain even more infants for adoption; ie, a marketing tool. These people refer to PAL as "Adoption Friendly Language" or AFL. Some of these first parents prefer that we use "Honest Adoption Language" (HAL), as they believe these terms more accurately reflect the hidden and/or ignored realities of adoption as it applies to them.
|
Common Term: |
Honest Term: |
Reason for preference: |
|---|---|---|
|
birth mother |
original, or natural mother or parent OR mother OR parent |
The term "birth" mother limits a woman's role in her child's life to the birth, casting her in the role of incubator or breeder. With reunion now an everyday event, women are finding themselves involved in the lives of their children in many ways,on a spectrum that runs from casual contact through friendship all the way to reintegrating their children into their original families. A powerful view, especially held by those in Ireland who cared for their children before being forced to relinquish them to adoption, is that the term 'birth' mother implies that they only served as a brood mare when in fact they often raised and cared for their children for up to two years.[11] The "b" word is a dehumanizing term. It also implies that the relationship between mother and child has been severed permanently, which is no longer a given. |
|
give up for adoption |
surrender for adoption |
"Give up" implies a lack of value, whereas the truth is that most women wish to raise their own child. HAL acknowledges that past adoption practice facilitated the taking of children for adoption, often against their mother's expressed wishes. Many women who have gone through the process and who lost children to adoption believe that social work techniques used to prepare single mothers to sign Termination Of Parental Rights papers closely resembles a psychological war against motherhood as nature has mandated it; hence the term "surrender." [12] HAL agrees that "Make a plan" and "Place" are more emotionally neutral, but fundamentally dishonest terms which marginalize or deny the wrenching emotional event of separation on the mother/child dyad. |
|
real mother/father/parent |
mother/father/parent |
Possible modifiers for the parental role include: real, legal, adoptive, first, original, natural. No modifiers are needed for the individual who gives birth; this person has been referred to as "mother" since time immemorial. |
|
adopted child |
adopted person or person who was adopted |
The use of the adjective 'adopted' signals that the relationship is qualitatively different from that of parents to birth children. The use of the word "child" is accurate up until the end of childhood. After that the continued use of the word "child" is infantalizing. |
|
positive adoption language |
adoption friendly language |
Those who practive Honest Adoption Language believe that Positive Adoption Language is a creation of the adoption industry whose function it is to reframe adoption in the most flattering light possible. In the process of reframing, much of the experience of families who have lost children to adoption is ignored, hidden, or revised. |
Variations in adoption
Adoption need not always entail assuming the title of "mother" and/or "father" to an orphaned child. Traditionally in Arab cultures if a child is adopted he or she does not become a “son” or “daughter,” but rather a ward of the adopting caretaker(s). The child’s family name is not changed to that of the adopting parent(s) and his or her “guardians” are publicly known as such. Legally, this is close to other nation's foster caring but often with closer parental feelings.
In Korean culture, adoption almost always occurs when another family member (sibling or cousin) gives a male child to the first-born male heir of the family. Adoptions outside the family are rare. This is also true to varying degrees in other Asian societies.
See also
External links
Canada
- Adoption Links (Adoption Council of Canada)
- Canadian Council of Natural Mothers
- Origins Canada
Ireland
- The Adoption Board
- AdoptionIreland: The Adopted People's Association
- The Natural Parents' Network of Ireland
United Kingdom
Australia
United States
bg:Осиновяванеda:Adoptere de:Adoption fr:Adoption he:אימוץ ילדים lt:Įvaikinimas nl:Adoptie ja:養子縁組 pl:Adopcja pt:Adoção fi:Adoptio sv:Adoption
- Adoption Crossroads USA
- Mothers Exploited by Adoption
- Origins USA
- Out Of The Fog: Mothers Speak About Adoption
- Main article: Adoption in the United States